A Visit To See D...With The Case Always Looming Nearby

   On Nov 10th, 2011 I was in Winnipeg to spend some time with D for one week. It was so nice. He has been staying with my brother since August. I am so appreciative of their willingness to have him stay there as long as it takes.
  D has wonderful support from both of our families. I have mentioned it before. We are both very grateful of their generosity and support during his time in Winnipeg.
  I wanted the visit to be mostly enjoying each other and the visiting of immediate family.
  I saved the "not so good stuff" for the way home. One can't get away from that.
  I read Sharon's affidavit on the plane ride home and made several notes. I had read a large portion of her 2 volume exhibits attached to the affidavit on the last day I was in Winnipeg. WOW!!
  The predominant response is chuckling. We literally laughed at some of the content. Not in a facetious way but a truly light hearted way.
  The repetition of information filed by Sharon was incredible. How easy it is to lie and to file false information with the courts is astounding to me. D had to respond to all of this nonsense. He had to answer to it as he had the final response. He stated it was more wasted time and hours of effort to respond yet again to the same accusations.
  He had provided factual information and letters from our attourney, our CPA, and the IRS.
  The clock ticks...ticks...ticks...

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Feels Like A Three Ring Circus

 Well a few days ago D texted me that he had been served with papers from Sharon/attourney. She changed attourneys and I will post about that in a little bit. 
 The papers were for D to appear in front of a Master (or so he thought) on Nov 8th, 2011 to address a request that Sharon was making. She had numerous requests of D to remove several paragraphs in his prior affidavit/s and to pay costs of this latest legal process. This is explained in his posts above.
  I truly felt this to be a purposeful delay and a tactic to get him to pay some money as they knew he had none. Their goal would be to delay the Trial. Sharon/atty would either shake D up to produce some cash or truly delay the process because he could not pay.
  The madness of it all is that with delays, Sharon does not get any support money (to be determined at the Trial) and she continues to spend money on all of these legal proceedings.
  The only one making money is the attourney and the courts. Fees are required by the courts for all sorts of reasons.
  The children are lost in all of it. D wants to get some type of resolution and start paying his kids directly.
  So many times all I can do is shake my head in disbelief. I cannot make any sense of the system or process allowed.
  It literally feels like a three ring circus or a puppet show. It's about moving according to who is holding the marionnette strings or following the circus master.
  I cannot imagine how it truly feels for D right in the middle having to go here and there and respond to constant BS. To remain focused and strong through all of it is remarkable to say the least.
  I am so proud of him. What an honor it is to be going through life with such an incredible person as a partner. I love you baby!

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More Web Weaving!

   In what I thought was the right process of the court,  I had asked both my Mom and my Auntie Diane to file affidavits to corroborate my affidavit regarding Sharon's manipulation of the courts and her continuous alienation of my children from their family. These affidavits were filed by the beginning of November 2011. Sharon had continued to be letigious over the many years. She had been awarded a Protection Order against my Mom for hugging my son A at his school when he was a young boy. She had asked A if she could hug him and he had replied "yes". My Aunt had had an encounter with Sharon that same evening at the school Christmas Program. Sharon had whispered in her ear from behind. Sharon mentioned that she would make certain that this (the hugging incident) would never happen again. I don't know the exact language used and am summarizing. 
  Again, the other side put forth a motion to Expunge both of these affidavits and be awarded costs in one lump sum to be paid immediately. This time I knew what to do as far as court process.  Things didn't go as well as the first time. The new Master Expunged both affidavits and awarded costs to be determined by the trial Judge in January. This is the trial I have been waiting for since I came to Canada.
  I got through this one by the skin of my teeth. Their affidavits had been filed too late and should have been filed with my affidavit in October 2011. At least my trial would not be delayed. All in learning the system as I represent myself.
  So back to the beginning.
  I called Sharon's lawyer to see when we should do the cross examination (Discovery). She stated we had a problem as she would be in court all week and would have to get back to me after she talked to her client Sharon. I got a call back in a couple of days and I agreed to not do the cross examination for discovery to be able to keep the Trial date of Jan 17, 2012. Now mid December, we would not have enough time to fully complete discovery with transcripts being done, and meeting filing dates etc.
  I spent a couple of weeks at the court house checking out family court trials and doing research on case law. Yuk!  Anyway, I never saw Sharon's lawyer once in that time, nor was she ever listed on any dockets I looked at while there. 
  This is only a very small part of the family court system and how it spins the web.

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Weaving My Way Through The Legal Web

  The past month or two have been trying. We were supposed to have a cross examination for discovery in November. "Discovery" is when each side asks questions of the opposing parties (Sharon and I). The discovery was what I called, "postponed" and Sharon's lawyer called, "re-scheduled".
   After I filed (with the courts) one of my affidavits on Oct. 24th, 2011, the other side notified me by mail regarding wanting to expunge (have removed) half of the content of my affidavit.  Sharon's lawyer would not go ahead with the exam for discovery until the Master (Judge) made a decision on their motion to expunge.  I, of course had no recourse but to agree as I didn't have a physical location to hold the discovery examination. So wait I did. They were asking the Master to make a decision as to costs involved for the expungement process. They wanted me to have to pay for the costs in one lump sum before I could continue with my case.
  I was under the impression that I was suppose to have to appear in a court setting before the Master to argue the expungement matter in person. I was preparing for this type of forum for several days.

  I went to the court house for the time listed on the docket (8:30). To my surprise there was no personal appearance needed. As I found out, the decision would be heard behind closed doors. Did I feel like a fool. I was quite pissed off at myself for wasting that much time.  I rushed back to my computer (30mins from the courthouse) to try and make some kind of written response even though I knew the reply was very late.  I put a one page reply together and rushed back to the court house to try to have it filed and hopefully put in front of the Master.
  The Master did not award costs (in one lump sum). This was the one thing I was really worried about.  I did not want to delay the already slow court process.  I had/have no money to pay any lump. The Master did remove 6 of my 11 paragraphs. Of the 5 remaining, two of my most important paragraphs containing crucial information were left in my affidavit.
  I felt successful!

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My August Visit

  I went to Winnipeg for 4 days. I wanted to spend time with both immediate families in one spot and just have fun and laughs. D's mom's cottage at the lake was perfect!  Thanks Alice. D helped to bring it together and Steve became the "camp" chef.
 We ate, sat around the fire and laughed, walked on the beach, swam, rode bikes, and just spent time together.
  It really could not have been more perfect. 
  No matter the surroundings, there is always talk of D's case. He is never on hiatus from it. He lives this daily. I am so grateful for such wonderful family. Thank you everyone for contributing to my memorable short vacation.

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D Could Not Be Nabbed Over The Wires...

  On Oct 27th, 2011 I was talking with D early in the morning as he had hit a rough patch.  He had not been feeling very well and the sleep he had been getting was less than adequate. His emotions were raw.
  He missed his children so much. He thought about them daily. He was constantly thinking about what he would say to them and how he would say it when and if he ever saw them again. He was in tears on the phone. He had to release what he felt.
  We chatted for a while and then there was a knock at my front door. I told D to hold on.  I opened the door and there were the Sherriff's boys looking at me.
  I started with "Hi. Same guys." The one fellow said, "Yeah is DM here?" I responded with, "Guys he's still in Canada. This is him on the phone. I'm talking to him in Canada. He's going to be there until next year." D was hearing all of it. The dialogue went back and forth a minute or two and the officer was very cordial. I was warned of a sweep that was being done this weekend.
  Their demeanor was completely different this time around. They parked in front of the house across the street rather than down the block. They came in day light rather than 0500 and the officer was leaning against my doorway in a casual fashion. They did not ask to come in to take a look and they did not ask twice for DM.
  It actually felt like they acted with their hearts this time and believed me instantly. That meant something to me. It truly did. There was a connection.

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Regaining Strength

   July of 2011 went by and some healing was taking place. D was getting back into the groove and would take some action as needed to stay on task. It was such a difficult, emotional roller coaster that D was on. Not a single one of us in his entire circle could truly empathize. We could imagine and sympathize but unless we had walked in similar shoes...we would not possibly know exactly the feelings he experienced. Love and support...we all gave him that. 
  Here he was in the same city as his children and he could not even see them. There was an old order in place that he could not go near the marital home. He was almost 100% certain they both still lived at home. How could he ever reach out to them? How would they ever know the truth? Would they? Would he ever have any type of relationship with them? Did they hate him? Did they fear him? What were they told? He felt so helpless and hopeless at times. I so wanted to just be there to hug him so tight and to walk beside him through this.
  I decided to come see him for a few days to encourage him and spend time with him as he was catching his second gust of wind. He was regaining strength for the next leg... keeping his children in the forefront of his mind. That was the driving force! Regardless of whether he would ever have a relationship with his children or not, D would press on to set the record straight once and for all.
  Yet another Maintenance Enforcement hearing was scheduled at the beginning of August. I booked my trip to come just after the hearing. I seriously was not sure if I would be visiting him through bars or not, however slight the possibility.


 PLEASE check out our resource links in the TOP RIGHT hand corner. These resources will include both Parent Alienation/Syndrome information as well as support for divorced families. Become a follower as this will help us grow our audience.